That’s a new concept for me, I tend to go slow and overcomplicated but here goes.
Apparently this is National Poetry Week! So I thought I’d would be a great reason to attempt a post!?! Over the years I’ve used poetry as a way to express my feelings. Some I think are good, most are pretty poor and a few are a real eye opener for people who wish to know me!
I thought as a quick post I’d share with you the poems from that collection that have a special meaning for me! They may not be great or even fulfil all the ‘rules’ of poetry but I’ve never been one to follow rules well. Hope you can feel them, if so then great! If not, or if you have any unhelpfully negative comments please can you keep them the fuck to yourself? Constructive criticism welcome!
This was written in what I now class my early years, but back then I thought I was at least high school level of my learning curve with crohns! I didn’t know anything really. That version of me would be amazed with life now…
As is the case with all we do, if lucky, as we grow up our views mature with us (most of us anyway!). So jump forward to 2012, I now have support via online groups but no colon, no job and no real idea of what my future is going to throw at me anymore. At the beginning of specialised groups on Facebook trying to raise awareness, trying to help those who haven’t reached out or those well seasoned sufferers who still don’t know there is a big family waiting; we decided to make a stand. This was my contribution at the time…
This special awareness drive bought out more people and more groups. So many various stories from people all over the world. So many people, even in this day and age, that have suffered more by people’s actions to them than the disease themselves!
It opened up the world of Ostomates to me, along with the realisation most people were hiding their stoma! There was a stigma we were supposed to live behind, hide it away like it was dirty! I knew some thought it was a negative but the naive side of me always assumed it was just a lack of education, but I was hearing stories of families turning their backs, loved ones walking away in disgust and friends no longer being around just because we have had a surgery performed that saved our lives. In 2013 these heart breaking stories prompted me to do what I do best! Open my gob and let the words fall out. Long before the news articles of girls by pools, looking sexy with a stoma, I put this on my facebook..
I know it’s not poetry, or any where close to poetry but the words I put are still some of the most poetic words I’ve ever thrown together! So I wanted to include it here.
After writing this on the Spur of the moment I was joined by 3 other friends who stood up proud and shouted out for awareness, It made me so proud to know these girls. They all showed a bravery I don’t think they were even aware of having, after all it still took another 18 months until a photo of a young girl by a pool, who happened to be a fellow crohny and bag lady, went viral and then made the daily papers. This in turn helped our community as more quiet sufferers came forward. They join groups and raised money and awareness like never before!
Thank you, to all the groups big and small across the world that now gives me an outlet to help, a safe place to be me and the opportunity to make friends with people I never knew existed! Connecting all the people with IBD, giving us all the with a strength to continue, to live and to prove to the world we are not ashamed.
Ready for a giggle? I said at the start of this that the concept of quick and simple was new to me! Well……..It’s not my fault, not entirely! I started writing this on Wednesday evening. I was having difficulty linking the 2nd poem to this post on my tablet so dragged out the laptop, thinking that as I had a few days to finish I would complete editing a few pictures I was doing of the dogs in the park (That’s a soppy post for another day!) but by the time I’d finished it was 3 am (ish) so I walked Lola and went to bed! Thursday started so well, I was getting ready to take Lola for her run, with plans to get back and start preparing the house for our weekend guest and then sit down to finish this and the photos later in the day, none of this happened! I’d like to say there’s a logical explanation but there’s not……
I stabbed myself in the eye with my very pointy edged tweezers!
No, I have no idea quite how it happened!
Yes, it hurt!
No, it wasn’t on purpose and here’s one for the grumpy emergency GP I saw on Friday, No! I had no idea there was an emergency eye clinic and no I don’t think it’s a waste of time as I do have immune system issues that involve my eyes! (some IBDers, like me, suffer from uveitis or iritis)
This of course meant that between the pain, the worsening pain as I sweated (apparently my eyelids also sweat when they’re closed Damn you hyperhidrosis!), the time spent at the drs and the delay because I kept dropping things because my depth of field was different (on top of my very numb fingertips!) the quick house tidy took me 2 days just to tidy downstairs! Upstairs remains untouched Lol! This also knackered me out physically and mentally! Today was Sunday, I had wanted to finish this yesterday, then when I woke this morning I was adamant it had to be finished today otherwise it wouldn’t be posted during National Poetry Week!
It’s now 01:45 am on Monday morning and by the time I read this back to check for errors I’ll not be posting this during Poetry Week, but it’ll be posted so I’ll mark this as a success…. Every positive thought held eh?
AND that’s how I do quick and simple! Lol x